Thursday, October 20, 2005

mayday, mayday, urgent assistance required. please SOS, wee oo, wee oo, wee oo, wah, wah, wah, beeeeeeeep, beeeeeeeeeeeep.

now i realise this may completely undo all the gold stars you have been giving me, completely on trust, over my last post about what a nutritional goddess i am, with regards to princess's upbringing

BUT now i will confess i have allowed something quite saccharine, full of preservatives and artificial badness to come into our lives


yes, we have started watching neighbours. we have watched about four episodes now, but not consecutively.

so tonight we watched neighbours and i have some questions. because princess kept saying things like:

"why doesn't she like him?" and "what's the secret they are keeping from those kids?" "mummy, tell me what's going on!"

and i'm shushing her and saying "I CAN'T HEAR" and "LET ME WORK IT OUT AND THEN I'LL EXPLAIN TO YOU!!"

so i would really appreciate some help to get me up to speed so i can fill her in on what's the go.

i remember some of the names from years ago, so it makes me seem like i know more than i do.

1. why does... oh shit, where's my bit of paper where i wrote down my questions, let me go and get it.


1. why do Joe and Janelle hate each other? are they brother and sister, or exes?

2. what is Susan's problem with her friend? (This is the guy who is Zeke and Rachels' father?) Is he a goodie or a baddie? Does she know the whole story?

3. i know this goes back a way, but why did Carl and Susan break up.

also, if anyone could give me a groups precis, ie who belongs to who family wise.

much appreciated.


Clokeeeey! said...

I'll give you my sister-in-laws phone number.

MelbourneGirl said...

clokes, do you mean you don't watch? come on, i need answers here, by tomorrow night, when we may watch again

shit that reminds me, have to set up tape for the surgeon. i taped the first, and will tape the second and maybe sometime next week get to check it out

and i also taped australian princess.

call me pathetic

Clokeeeey! said...

Last time I watched neighbours for more than an episode in a row, Charlene and Scott were still in ramsay st.

Magical_M said...

all i know is that bouncer is long dead.

Another Outspoken Female said...

Sorry can't help with this one, but if you want an update of 'queer as folk' (which really is much less harmful for the little ones than 'neighbours') let me know.

Dxxxx said...

I only watch it erratically myself but i'll give it my best...

1. OH. Not a great start. I don't know. I think they're both just westie bogans... and maybe because janelle et al were living with joe's gf (I can't for the life of me remember her name - anyway, the mother of Steph) before he talked some sense into her & she kicked them out.

2. I obv havent watched in a while. Are Zeke & Rachel the kids of her boyfriend/fiance? He has cancer but hasn't told her. Carl told her though, so now she knows.

3. I think Carl had an affair, with Izzy maybe? I still think they will get back together, eventually.

Maybe you can fudge your way through princess' questions ...


elaine said...

3. Carl didn't quite have an affair with Izzy but really wanted to.

Izzy didn't want Carl until she was pregnant with some short term charachter's baby. She tricked Carl into thinking that the baby was his and they got together and broke up when Carl found out.

1. and 2. I haven't watched neighbours for a long time so don't know who these people are.

Creepiest storyline: Susan had a relationship with her friend's cousin who was a catholic PRIEST!

MelbourneGirl said...

bouncer was a dog yeah?

thanks everyone. i still want to know whether janelle and joe had a pre-relationship of some sort. they were really going at each other the other night.

but you have all been most helpful.

sublime-ation said...

I'm with Clokeeeey! on this one.

MelbourneGirl said...

never mind

[hangs head]

elaine said...

sorry mg, I used to watch but that was when I was living with my ex who never got home from wok until 8 at night.

I haven't watched an episode in months and was really confused to see on an ad that Joe was back.

Is Janelle stingray's mum?

Clokeeeey! said...

I remember when bouncer got hit by the van. Why couldn't they just send him to QLD with all the others?

Dxxxx said...

Did Bouncer get hit by a car?? shit, that is a bit macarbe for a kids show.... damn....

And yes, I think Janelle is Stingrays mum..

(I still can't believe they put a family of bogans on TV -what next?)


Anonymous said...

Like most others, I am a little behind on my Neighbours know-how. But you might want to go here for some (not much) back story and even a few suggested storylines.

Riss said...

The families on Ramsay Street are:
Bishop & Mangel
Scully & Timmins

Joe Mangel (living with the Bishops) has hit it off with Lyn Scully. Janelle Timmins and her crew (Dylan, Scott (Stingray), Jenae and Bree) moved in to Ramsay Street with not much of a penny to their name and Lyn Scully took pity on them and invited them into her home after their "home" was reposessed. Joe Mangel sees that Janelle Timmins is taking advantage of Lyn Scully (and she is) and seems bent on forcing Janelle out of the Scully house. Janelle has also just written a piece of putative fiction about everyone in Ramsay Street and Joe distributed it via email to people like Carl Kennedy, Lou Carpenter, and others in the street, to be malicious and now some of these receipients of the work want to sue Janelle for defamation (or similar). Janelle knows that it was Joe who sent the file so is not very hapy with him.

Lyn and her husband have split and the only members of the Scully family now living in the street are her young son Oscar and Stephanie who is now married to Max Hoyland and is living across the street.

The Hoylands are Max (widower), his sister Isobel (Izzy), son Boyd (repeating Year 12 after a bad pass, brain tumour (was seeing Sky Mangel at the time and are now split up) and work at a Gym where I think he was meant to be taking performance-enhancing drugs), and daughter Summer who is no longer seen but they talk to her on the telephone. Max Hoyland and Stephanie Scully have married and have had trouble conceiving a child but Steph is now carrying their baby.

Izzy Hoyland is a wild child. Has had a miscarriage recently after a pairing with a scary friend of Max's resulted in a pregnancy which she then pretended was as a result of a relationship she subsequently developed with Dr Carl Kennedy. Izzy ended up being blackmailed by Darcy (a relative of the Kennedys) who looked at her medical records while working at the hospital and who then "fell" into a coma after an "accident" in a hospital stairwell after trying to extract more money and Izzy thought she was free. Darcy woke up and Izzy had miscarried and still not told Carl. Izzy had a fling with Paul Robinson but was still seeing Carl. Carl found out about the deception and was severely annoyed - they then broke up. Paul Robinson had a fling with Liljana Bishop which ended after mob-type characters left him for dead when he fell over a cliff. From this fall he now has an amputation and a prosthetic leg. Paul and Izzy now live together while Izzy gets over her drug addiction. Paul's long-lost daughter, Elle, is playing havoc with their lives.

With regard to Susan Kennedy, now Susan Smith (maiden name) after Dr Carl's mid-life crisis and the subsequent divorce (resulting in the wardrobe and hairstyle change you see now - beautiful), and her now "fiance", Alex Kinsky(?), Dr Carl has been treating Alix for advanced cancer and Alex confessed to Susan his condition (after some nasty looks from Dr Carl) but has not yet told his children that he has, possibly, months to live. Although engaged to be married before the confession, Alex and Susan no longer plan to get married but just to continue a supportive relationship (this they have also yet to make public).

Harold Bishop has his son David Bishop living with him (after David's business went belly-up and they needed somewhere to stay) and David's wife Liljana and daughter Serena. Serena has been seeing Connor O'Neill. Sky Mangel is also living with Harold who is her grandfather. Sky's father is Joe Mangel and her mother has passed away. Sky is seeing Dylan Timmins. Joe has a greyhound now called Bouncer. It's Bouncer III or Bouncer IV or Bouncer V or, you get the drift...

Sky, Dylan, Serena, Boyd and Stingray are all finishing Year 12.

Connor O'Neill, Toadfish Rebecchi, Stuart Parker and Ned Parker are all living in "The House Of Trouser" on Ramsay Street. Connor has a child, Madeleine or Maddy, from a previous (extremely brief) relationship with a kiwi girl. Toadfish is a lawyer and Stuart is a police constable. Stuart's brother Ned is visiting from Shepparton and is a gardener/handyman with a bit of a thing for Izzy which is not reciprocated (although Elle Robinson is interested). Lou was staying with them for a while but he has moved into the local caravan park and is giving away food from the General Store much to Harold's dismay.

Note about the General Store - there was a fire and the Coffee Shop and pub, Lou's Place, went up with Sindi Watts (later to become Watts-Parker and now not in the series after becoming a bit of an obsessive basket-case) and Stuart Parker trapped in the cellar. Lou Carpenter and Max Hoyland owned the pub and after the fire there was a difference of opinion about what services were needed and Harold and Lou partnered to make the General Store (with coffee shop and post office) while Max and Isobel Hoyland went partners in the Scarlet Bar. Lassiter's Hotel was untouched.

I think that's all I can give you right now as my other half is requesting dinner but if you have any other questions I'd be happy to help!


P.S. I'm not usually this much into a television series, I've just been on holiday...

BEVIS said...


I was going to do the same thing Riss has done, but admitting that I'm fully-briefed on the show would have been a little embarrassing. This way, I can pretend I know nothing about it and just laugh along!

Oh, wait - I just admitted it, didn't I.

I don't think there's much that Riss left out, except that David Bishop has been keen to join his father Harold's Salvation Army band (he has very high goals in life), and he recently 'proved' himself to Harold, being allowed to join the band. He also won $250,000 in the lottery, but decided to give it all to the Salvos anonymously. Lou Carpenter and David's wife Lilijana are the only people who know that David briefly had this money. Initially, Lil was devastated, as she only learned of the winnings AFTER David had given it away, but he said something nice about already being the luckiest man alive because he has Lil, Harold and Serena, so she came around. Lou was devastated to learn that so much money had just been given away to charity.

Serena and Connor are on thin ice at the moment, due to Connor being blackmailed by former girlfriend Carmella, daughter of a gangster (note: a different gangster to the ones who chased Paul Robinson off a cliff - Erinsborough is the hub of gangster territory), and in order to win Connor back, Carmella pretended to have borrowed the $50,000 he needed for a hearing operation for his infant daughter Maddy from her gaoled gangster father, when in reality she just got it from her very-well-to-do mother. Her conditions for loaning Connor the money included him spending secret time with her, away from his girlfriend Serena. This he went along with for a while, always turning down her advances and being 'shirty' with her, but still she pushed and even pretended that the 'first instalment of his repayments' was suddenly due - throwing Connor into a panic because he imagined serious trouble if payment was not received. In his haste to pay what he imagined were Carmella's gangster connections, he stole money from the bikini shop he, Stu, Toadie, Serena and her parents work in / run, and then pretended to have been mugged and had the money stolen on his way to the bank after work. After Carmella accepted this first payment, she realised what she was doing was wrong, admitted to Connor that it was a ruse to win him back but that she could see they would never be together again, and after he initially flipped out over it, he drove her home. Unfortunately, Serena saw them driving past (he had told Serena he was somewhere else), so she worked out that he'd been seeing Carmella behind her back.

When Connor approached Serena the next day to come clean with her, she called him on his deception first, and they had a blow-out.

Meanwhile, Paul Robinson has taken Dylan Timmins' business idea on board to celebrate Lassiter's Hotel's 20th anniversary. Dylan's idea was to have a joy flight to a Tasmanian casino, and invite Ramsey Street business people and other select locals along. Harold was invited but didn't feel like it, so he gave his invitation to David and Lil instead. Dylan is going along, taking Sky with him, and of course Paul is going with Elle and Izzy. Somehow, Susan and Alex scored an invite, and Connor and Serena are also invited.

Stay tuned next week for the disaster crash that will apparently claim three of these peoples' lives!

Who will it be??


Ahem. I don't watch Neighbours.

BEVIS said...

Oh, and I meant to say that Riss' description of the Joe/Janelle/Lyn argument was spot-on. (As was pretty much everything else she had to say.)

Also, Max's daughter Summer has been away on a 'music scholarship' for the past few months. She applied for and was awarded the thing - and then left for wherever this music boarding school is located - within three days (both in reality and in the show's timeline), so it was clearly a case of needing to write her out of the show in a hurry. Interesting that Max, Steph & Boyd never feel the need to visit her.

Personally, in a show of terrible storylines (ever since Ms Fits stopped writing for the show, anyway), and melodramatic over-actors, the actors who play Karl and Susan are remarkably good. I hope Susan isn't one of the three set to die in the plane crash, but I have a bad feeling that her number is up.

I also suspect that Dylan and Connor will die, for the following reasons:

-Dylan and Stingray were recently blackmailed into commiting a robbery by one of Dylan's old law-breaking friends, and this has been playing on the boys' minds (especially Stingray's) ever since. I reckon Dylan'll die before having to face the music, and that will leave Stingray to take the rap on his own.

-Connor has to answer for his false claim of the bikini shop money being stolen from him in a mugging, when effectively he stole it himself.

Although they sound like the same reason, I reckon these two boys are going to 'pay for their sins' in true television style. Plus, Susan dying would be the most heartbreaking all round - for the women on the street, for the students of Erinsborough High, for Karl, for Alex, and for the Timmins' kids (who she took a shine to and sort of mentored, particularly Stingray and Bree).

That's just my guess, though. I really don't think Izzy or Paul will die, and Alex has barely joined the show (although maybe he was only around to die off and leave his kids in Susan's care?). Elle could die, as a guest star, but she hardly qualifies and I don't think her role on the show is finished yet (she has too much potential to cause trouble!). Serena probably won't die, but I guess either of her parents could. Possibly even both. Nothing much has happened with Sky recently, so maybe she could die (it'd give Joe a reason to leave the show again - at the moment he's just a recurring guest star who won't leave!). But I think it's more likely to be Connor, Dylan and Susan (with a possible swap of Susan for Alex from that list).

Riss said...

Thanks, BEVIS, for checking my facts. :) I wasn't really sure what happend to Marisa Siketa (Summer) but my sources tell me that she had been wanting to leave the show for a while as the trip from Geelong (where she lives) was getting a bit much.

I wasn't allowed to watch Neighbours when I was at school, we had to watch Home And Away instead. My Dad delights in whistling the theme tune entirely off-key... because he can and because my sisters would complain about it. I love it.

BEVIS said...

Home and Away is the reason I know all about Neighbours. The TV is always on as Wifey and I prepare the evening meal*, so more often than not, we're watching Neighbours and Everybody Loves Raymond. We have to have it on one of the channels (as we don't care for each other's conversation), and we're not interested in watching the current affairs programs on the other stations.

And I'm sorry, but no matter how bad you think Neighbours is, Home and Away is far, far worse.

* Which is to say: Wifey cooks and I do one or more of the following:

- watch;
- help;
- muck around for laughs;
- get in the way.

MelbourneGirl said...

oh my god, riss and bevis, i bow down before you both

i am so printing out all this information, so i can have on hand, to answer ALL princess's questions

and no bevis, i don't think any less of you

and riss, hope other half didn't get too hungry while waiting while you wrote that epic

will know where to go directly next time there are any questions, but i think i am well up to speed now.

Riss said...

Happy to be of assistance.

*doffs imaginary cap and makes a bow*

BEVIS said...

Same 'ere, guv'nor.

*doffs imaginary cap and makes a bow*

*picks pocket then runs away*

*realises this is insensitive, given your recent home-break-in.*


BEVIS said...

and no bevis, i don't think any less of you

... I was already about as low as it's possible to go in your estimation, right? :)

MelbourneGirl said...

no BEVIS. esteem is high for all blogworld people tonight.

BEVIS said...

Ah, you're a sweetie.

What is it they say about women?

No, the other thing.

That's it. They're like tea bags. (And not for all the nasty reasons you'd think!)

It's only when you put them in hot water that they show their true strength.

I really like that quote (although it's paraphrased with a bit of BEVIS thrown in to keep it interesting!).


And I think it's very true of you. You've had this thing happen to you and it's had repercussions of loss, violation, anger, fear, and then the extra element of it upsetting your daughter so much (and others).

Your response (at least that which we've been witness to online) has been to write a partly-angry but mostly-defiant post on the subject (which is both cathartic and wise), then to draw some 'perspective' with the recent loss of your brother's best friend.

You have maturely and sensibly answered your daughter's questions on the subject in a way that will help her deal with her fear, and also give her a very adult and healthy view on both the crime itself, and the more wide-spread problem of addiction that was probably the cause.

You have remained a top-notch mother throughout.

And you're even holding on loosely to the items that were stolen.

And then to top it all off, you talk about us as though we've been wonderful for you!

No, dear lady - you've been an inspiration to us.

There were other praise-points I intended to add to that list when I started typing it up, but it's late and I'm tired and I'm getting old and I've forgotten what else I was going to say (sorry).

But even with the list I have there, you're still a very strong cuppa tea!

Ooh! With peppermint!

MelbourneGirl said...

thank you bevis. i feel very happy to know i have friends here, ones i've never met, who care. it's cool. and it's good. just goes to show. people ARE good. there is a lot of goodness in the world. sometimes i lose sight of that, and get overwhelmed with all the negative stuff. i am a very positive person, but things can get in the way of that.

today i cancelled my age subscription. when she asked me why i said "there's too much bad news in the world at the moment. i just want a break from it." she didn't try to re-sell it to me.

you know, about being mature and wise and all that. it's having a child that has really shown me the way. you can't fall apart when you have a little face looking up at you, with tears and distress. you have to be strong, and show them the way. and you just do it. it's no hardship, it's a pleasure. and it's good for me too. i learn so much from her. so much.

MelbourneGirl said...

but on neighbours. so the police came to talk to stingray who was covering for (dark long hair boy with annoying inward turning fringe). paul's son? what has he done that paul said he would make sure he didn't go to jail?

no hang on, i've just re-read. he is dylan, ok, i've got it now.

i really do need to print all this out, and have a neighbours file. i think we'll be watching this for a while now.

BEVIS said...

Paul kinda took Dylan under his wing when Dylan started doing odd jobs for Paul around the traps (read: he was employed as Paul's 'heavy'), and I think Paul took a shining to him because he saw a little of himself in Dylan or something soppy like that.

The look out for each other because Paul sees him as a good investment (and possible heir?), while Dylan sees Paul as the one person who ever had faith in him as someone who could 'make it'. It's rubbish, they're thick as theives (only Paul is a white collar criminal and Dylan is a blue collar criminal - although not always exclusively, either of them).

It's addictive, in a weird, sad kind of way, isn't it!

Great to hear Princess can claim responsibility for your strength, then! You help each other out, in that way.

The cancellation of your Age subscription amused me! I must remember that line.