nothing to report. thank god.

no contact with princess today. i had a reasonable day, a few interruptions to work and then fell asleep in bed at around 3.30pm. until around 5.30pm. then felt like shit, but better after went for a walk with the gigi.

i'd forgotten how arvo naps can just suck your energy. i think the trick is keeping it short, like about 30 mins is perfect. will try that next time.

so, over the hump here. no further word from karen, but i imagine she might send something else. we shall see.

it's day 14

and 13 days to go.

i wanted to write about crash, a movie we watched the other night. pomgirl had suggested it as a goodie, and we already had it out.

it was good and really hooked into the reading i've been doing, and where i got that freaky list of black/not black celebs. i've been reading about language and identity, as well as biculturalism, and of course racism comes up, and how everything is measured against a white "norm".

so crash. it was brave, and not heavy handed. the acting was good. it was not predictable (i cannot stand predictability in anything other than my soap operas) and i liked it. you saw that not every one is bad (which is true), even arseholes have their own story, of pain and suffering.

it made me think of desiderata, a poem i try and remember when i am not feeling buddhist.




Desiderata

Go placidly amid the noise and haste, and remember what peace there may be in silence.

As far as possible without surrender be on good terms with all persons.

Speak your truth quietly and clearly; and listen to others, even the dull and the ignorant; they too have their story.
Avoid loud and aggressive persons, they are vexations to the spirit.

If you compare yourself with others, you may become vain and bitter; for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.

Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans.
Keep interested in your own career, however humble; it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.

Exercise caution in your business affairs; for the world is full of trickery.

But let this not blind you to what virtue there is; many persons strive for high ideals; and everywhere life is full of heroism.
Be yourself.

Especially, do not feign affection.

Neither be cynical about love; for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment it is as perennial as the grass.
Take kindly the counsel of the years, gracefully surrendering the things of youth.

Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune.

But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings.

Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.

Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself.
You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here.

And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.
Therefore be at peace with God, whatever you conceive Him to be, and whatever your labors and aspirations, in the noisy confusion of life keep peace with your soul.
With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world.

Be cheerful.

Strive to be happy.


--- Max Ehrmann.



seems so simple doesn't it. but alot of it is really, really hard to do. for me anyway. if you read it carefully, and really think about each one (except the goddy bits, i'm not sure about them for me anyway), really try to get what he means. it is so, so beautiful.

so to say it again:

day 14
13 days to go